Sid & the tones

Formed: Leeds, England early 1959 as Silver Gnutones by Booch, Emacs-Evans, Dyer, Poole and Preston; In 1962 one word was dropped from the band name in a vain attempt to imitate the action of another - considerably more successful - band from the North. They were forced to reconsider their choice in favour of Gnutones when it was established that Silver was already in use by a music hall sister act from Ealing; it has remained Gnutones to this day since, in the words of the late "Porky" Dyer's sister, "They were too stupid to think of anything better. They knew fuck all about words, names, music, life, ..." Recent research reveals that temporary name changes occurred in the group's history when it became necessary in avoiding legal and financial difficulties; these were quite frequent given the turbulant nature of the group.

If one word were used to describe the band's oeuvre, it would not be innovative. With a single exception (Ted Poole, who was fired over the Rambo-Rimbaud confusion - more about that later), the driving force behind the band's existence was raw hedonism: the wealth, fame, drugs and sex that accompany a successful career. In retrospect, one can say that it was a good thing that none of the band members abandoned their day jobs; one could also say that they deserved everything they got. Success would come only when the public and the music industry were ready for the band's style and level of proficiency; sadly, that period of acceptance in their career lasted just a short time. DIY and the punk ethos were over before the lads figured out a way to steal from it.

That's it!. That's the word which best describes the work of the band: purloined. I realise that this choice will certainly cause consternation amongst fans, particularly those having no idea what it means. I gave due consideration to all the suggestions which turned up on the gnutones mailing list and have decided that candidates like appaling, banal and the like do not serve to uniquely describe their music; such words could be used to suitably describe the recorded output of many groups, particulary those who have won Grammy Awards and achieved recent induction in the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame - which by the way must have been some sort of grand jape as I drove down to Cleveland last May and no one I spoke to there seems to have heard of it, including BT! No one at the council offices nor anyone on the High Street had an idea what I was going on about. I would also remind the clever git who suggested Slack-Jawed Wonders, Cacophonous Rubbish, Suck Like a Fuckin' Hoover that we sought a single-word description in the discussion and not a haiku.

Len Blanks Sun Feb 2 05:36:28 GMT 1997